Yes I'm still on about the kidney stone.

I had momentary panic when I woke having missed a dose of pain medicine and in agony. Then after a the panic settled I remembered that I had similar really nasty pain after my first kidney stone, because that stone tore a damn hole on it's way out.

After the first stone I went back to the ER about a week and a half to two weeks after I passed that stone and was reassured that it was normal to hurt (that's part of why they prescribe more than a few days of pain medication), and that it could hurt intensely for up to three months.

Not especially reassuring but basically keep an eye on things, if I start to bleed, if pain worsens, or if I have unusual urine I should get looked at. I'm in about as much pain I was in before going to the ER but not as much pain as I had while actively passing the stone. So.. I just have to gut it out basically.

Thankfully I am not having to juggle school assignments and work with it this time. I was relating to Mom that I while passing the first stone I went to work, worked my full shift, went to school from there, and then went to my morning class the next day before I emailed my afternoon professor and begged off. I explained to her that I was actively passing a kidney stone, asked permission to submit my schoolwork via e-mail, and e-mailed her my ER note from a few days prior as proof that I wasn't just making excuses. She told me not to worry about the homework and to go home and rest and she hoped to see me next class. So, I went home immediately e-mailed her the assignment and doctor's note (because I listen SO well), and then went into the bathroom and finished passing the stone over the next three to six hours. Oh and I was foolish and turned down pain medication so I did all of that on pure stubborn stupidity. Never again.

That was really awful, and in contrast I have been mostly on bed rest, intermittently mobile (mostly to prepare food and eat so I can take my pain pills), and have really not had much pressure to do anything but try to rest and heal.

The really tricky thing is going to be how I do Tuesday. Mom and I have some minor dental work that needs doing, and I'm basically not able to wear anything but loose pajamas right now because my kidney is still inflamed, and it hurts to move or wear anything remotely constricting. I'm wearing a loose T-shirt and athletic shorts, and have basically not worn proper clothing since we left the ER.

So.. tomorrow I'm going to try and get dressed (gauge my pain) and see how much that hurts. That will determine how we do things Tuesday I think.

I'm still mostly eating soft easy to prepare food (toast, bagels with cream cheese, lots of orange juice, fresh fruit, instant mashed potatoes) because it takes too much energy to prepare AND eat food. I've done well with rinsing my dishes, and emptying the dishwasher, to minimize extra work for Mom.

In contrast to me at optimal health I'm eating very slowly. I tend to be the first one finished eating most of the time, and it's taking me forever to eat TOAST. It's taking me a half hour to eat a small bowl of mashed potatoes. It's very frustrating.

I have this incredibly unrealistic mindset of "I've passed the stone so obviously I'm FINE now. I should be instantly better right?" and I'm growing increasingly impatient with my very slow to heal body. If it were a ragdoll, I'd have thrown it across the room by now in a temper tantrum. It's been what, less than a week since I was diagnosed with the stone, and it took about two days to pass it from the ER visit so I'm only 2 days out from a huge physically traumatic instance and I'm fidgeting and going "COME ON LET'S GO! I WANT TO DO THINGS!!"

I have to laugh at myself because I barely have the strength to get up and walk to the restroom or kitchen and I'm sitting here going "Yeah I feel like crap, and I'm tired but I'm SO BORED." Not realistic at all.