Sunday, April 16, 2017

Happy Easter to those who celebrate it.

 First this:


Then a summary of my week.

Wednesday I finally realized the back pain that had been amping up was definitely left kidney (again). I asked Mom for visual confirmation of what I already knew was there and then politely requested that we make a visit to th ER. I felt bad because Mom was already tired and in pain from verboten back problem but it was a necessary visit whether either of us wanted it or not.

If you have me on Facebook you may have seen the play by play as Mom and I tag-teamed updates. Since many of you are not on my Facebook I will try to summarize. Wednesday evening we went over to a nearer ER than the one I went to last time. We expected a quick in and out sincecqe knew what the problem was and just needed confirmation. A CT scan confirmed at least one stone kicking about in left kidney in no hurry to escape. Urinalysis and bloodwork suggest I passed a small stone recently (within 24 hours) which would account for the inflamation and pain.

Also visible on the CT scan was an unexplained pocket of air in the abdomen. The doctors were concerned about this and had me do a contrast CT scan to try to find where the air was leaking from. They briefly mentioned possibly ending surgery immediately without further context. After contrast CT confirmed the air pocket but no leak, they told me they wanted to admit me to hospital and would discuss whether surgery was necessary. 12 hours without fluids or food later I spoke to the surgeon. He told me that surgery would entail cutting me from breastbone to pubic bone with no guarantee of finding anything, and that since CT did not show where the leak was he was disinclined to cut me open on the off chance he could find something and then hope so healed afterwards. He and the main doctor went back and forth about it for a few hours before he spoke to me.

They kept me a little longer because they didn't agree on whether I needed to stay for observation but finally Thursday afternoon I was released with antibiotics and some hydrocodone for when that stone breaks free.

I feel weak as a newborn kitten, partly from the 12 hour fast, partly from the radioactive contrast stuff ingested and via IV, and mainly because I couldn't sleep at all while there.

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

Falling asleep in public.

 I keep doing off, at school mid task. We had storm after storm blow through last night and with the severe weather alarm going off *EVERY* *SINGLE* *HOUR* I managed less than an hour of sleep. If I wasn't already a day behind in notes I'd have stsyed home and hoped for sleep. As it is my eyes are drying out from my contacts and I'm wishing I was home in bed. 

Monday, April 10, 2017

I don't have words.

I looked for an app to post to dreamwidth from my phone like I've been doing with lj and blogger, but no such app seems to exist. I will continue to crosspost my entries for awhile but will ve switching mainly to DW over time. Same screen name.

Current mood is this:


 Between people being assaulted and dragged off airplanes, airstrikes in Syria, gay concentration camps in Russia, I'm numb. I can't process any of it. I'm logically terrified and functionally shut down. 404 error, no Rory found.

Thursday, April 6, 2017

Notes to my doctor

I keep a memo with dates (And sometimes times) running to record things of interest regarding my health so I can remember to discuss them. Today's notes so far as of 6:30am local time:

"Woke up non-functional. Physically can not do things I can generally do. Migraine present, medicated, back scream with pain, joints spontaneously dislocating. I keep crying, I'm so frustrated. Actual tears. I haven't been capable of physical tears when crying in years.

I'm at a loss and feel defeated. What caused this? Yesterday I did a couple loads of laundry, minor tidying in my room, some more unpacking and careful shifting of things. I've thrown out my back. This shouldn't even be an issue.

I WANT to go to class but physically can not. It took 20 minutes to carefully get out of bed. I was limping and trying not to cry while in motion. I can't lift a pillow, let alone my backpack. I'm angry, tired, feel defeated over this.

I'm already freaking out about getting complete notes between several classmates. I have so much that needs doing and much of it is standard day to day stuff and I JUST can't today.
4/6/2017"

I am tired, sore, angry. I don't have more eloquent words.

If there are typos I fix that before my appointments.

Saturday, April 1, 2017

I'm technically alive.

I have been super bad about checking in. No kidney stones or other new and upsetting health things just a doozy of a migraine that lasted a week at 10/10 on pain scale coupled with sensory overload on all fronts. I have been incommunicado with every one except my mother intermittently because she lives with me and can gently prod me until I respond.

I don't feel well. Nothing in particular is wrong. Geology is going well. I have taken a bunch of pictures of random things and shared commented sporadically on Facebook, LiveJournal, and via text. Mostly I've been recovering physically from my trip to Tennessee and back.

Got to see BFF and her son, and also her Mom, who is pretty awesome. My Mom got to meet her, and also BFF's brother on our way through Nashville as we had a meal together to catch up and enjoy good food. I probably will continue to be less active. I have a laundry list of things to discuss with my primary when I see him on the 17th.

Wednesday, March 29, 2017

Migraines and stormy weather.

I woke at midnight with an intensified crippling migraine. I've been fighting this at varying intensities since Sunday.
The pain presented as such that I wouldn't handle light or sound at midnight in a darkened house. I could sort of grope through the dark with one eye covered but I've got migraine blindness going where great swathes of my vision are impaired. So, I pulled my sleep mask askance to cover my left eye (I drew this backwards) like so.


Of course there have been massive storms rolling through so Mom's safety alert radio went off  half dozen times between midnight and 2am. Because safety. The storm passed mostly to the North and South of us. That safety weather radio is a screamer and feels like a dental drill to the face even when I'm not suffering from a migraine.
I'm exhausted but nsot sure if I'll get sleep. Ugh.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Do the thing, win the points.

You know when you go to do a thing (anything) and then you get up and do something else necessary (thing two) instead, and about a half hour later you remember that you got up to do thing one in the first place? That is me today on infinite repeat.

Saturday, March 25, 2017

Short Post

Mom and I did a whirlwind run to East Tennessee and back. We were able to fit nearly everything into the Tardis. The last of it is less than half the truck bed.

Had a really great if short visit with Osaka and Ringo. We went to Boone, NC and visited a favorite eatery, Tucker's Cafe, as well as The Mast Store in Valley Crusis I think.

Weather prevented further joint adventure. We drove through light snow on the way there and back both. We also enjoyed lunch with Osaka's brother as we passed through Nashville, and so visited the Lego store there.

We got back roughly as scheduled and have been physically recovering since. My body took issue with the constant change in elevation and air pressure at our highway speeds flying through mountains and valleys. I had extreme physical distress the first day after we got back and have had fits of joint pain, migraines, etc.

Despite the pain, it was a good trip. I was so happy to be there at the farm with my very best friend and her son whom I also care deeply for.  I also enjoyed real proper winter weather for a few days.

School started up again Tuesday for me, and I've slipped back into my schedule. I'm hoping current migraine settles down and I feel human again soon. :)

Thursday, March 9, 2017

General Update

I thought I posted here after my follow up appointment but apparently not.

Copied from my post in my Bipolar Support group:

"I had my follow up appt with my primary Tuesday before class and after discussion he has upped my dose of Ritalin. He wants me to take the same dose per, four times a day instead of twice. This is supposed to even out the mood shifts I’ve been experiencing.

I’m also packing and organizing for my trip back to Tennessee to see my BFF and collect the rest of my belongings from storage at her place. We are planning to visit a few yarn stores before Mom and I turn around and head back.

I’m currently doing all of the prep, sorting what I need to take and trying to pack efficiently so we have more room in the cab of the truck. I made a checklist to be done over the next few days and I’m making decent progress at a reasonable rate.

We leave Friday evening and so my goal is to be packed, dressed, and ready by 4pm so I have two hours of flexibility to math out how I want to stack things behind my seat on the way there."

I've done everything on the checklist I made except load the truck and put last sundry items in suitcase.

Faythe, one of my sisters will be at the house doing some sundry maintenance and to help me unload on arrival back. Logan has also offered to help if he is not at work when we get in.

I am so thankful for my family and friends. I seriously could not ask for better people in my life. I am super excited to be visiting Osaka and Ringo, and Mom has timed the trip so we should actually get to catch up a bit before we turn around and head home.

I officially have just one class now. I failed my online courses. I could not do the heavy coursework because of health and inability to focus (because pain). It sucks but I'll deal with the school and try to prevent academic probation with medical documentation. I also have to argue with them that ASL counts as a language towards a degree so there is that too. I'll deal with that later in the semester.

Monday, March 6, 2017

Antibiotics again.

Thursday I woke up feeling more like death than usual. I'd been having some symptoms of a larger infection but I want sure what kind because my ambient pain levels make it hard to tell till an infection is BAD.

I emailed my doctor Wednesday with my concerns,  and woke Thursday and knew immediately there was no way I could focus in class or handle going to school. I don't miss class unless I'm actively in hospital or need to visit a clinic suddenly.

I wasn't able to secure a ride to the clinic but I was able to discuss with my Dr over the phone and he sent a script for an antibiotic to my preferred pharmacy (which delivers).

I have correctly predicted or self diagnosed several infections already so my Dr trusts my instincts on this. 

I have a week of antibiotics which I'm a few days into now. And Spring Break is around the corner. I see my Dr face to face tomorrow and will discuss how the Ritalin is working so if changes need to be made,  we can do that before Mom and I make our round trip to Tennessee. 

About Me

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I'm Rory or Rorek in most places. I design, sew, and craft, primarily for my Asian Ball-Jointed Dolls. I also dabble in interior design, but I'm a little out of practice.

I post about the things I enjoy, which are sewing, photographing my dolls, designing new outfits, knitting, which I started in September of 2008, thanks to my Mom, and occasionally drawing, or painting.

I also post about Life Events and how they affect me and those that I love.

Currently I am living in DFW, Texas in the USA and working towards a degree in Theology.